Jet lag is the universe's way of making you appreciate sleep over souvenirs.
I travel because my bank account needs more foreign transaction fees.
Travel: the only time when getting lost is considered a 'fun activity'.
There's no Wi-Fi in the forest, but I promise you will find a better connection.
I've got 99 problems and my passport got lost is number one.
Life is short. Buy the damn plane ticket. Overthink when you're back home.
Travel is the only thing you buy that makes you richer and your luggage heavier.
My favorite travel buddy is my passport – it’s as ready for new adventures as I am!
Some tourists think Amsterdam is a city of sin, but I prefer to think of it as a city of freedom. And in freedom, most people find sin.”
The awkward moment when customs finds your 'I'm smuggling fruit across borders' t-shirt hilarious... until they start searching your bags.
Travel: because where you are is not as interesting as where you could be in an hour.
My suitcase has seen more countries than some people’s TV remotes.
A vacation is having nothing to do and all day to do it. Tomorrow seems like a great option.
The road ahead may or may not be paved, but it's still going to charge you tolls.
When packing for a trip, just throw everything on the bed and see if it fits in the suitcase. Spoiler: It won't.
'Wanderlust' is my middle name... that I gave to myself... it's complicated.
I travel because my mom told me to follow my dreams. My dreams were to follow the airplane.
Every mile is a memory, and sometimes those memories need a map to find their way back to you.
I followed my heart, and it led me to the airport.
Airplanes make me nervous. But I´ll admit, they beat flapping my arms.
I'd rather have a passport full of stamps than a house full of stuff.
Travel: because adulting is better with scenic views and alcoholic beverages.
The downside of traveling the world is having to explain that I really don't know any famous celebrities personally.
Let's wander where the Wi-Fi is weak but the rum is strong.
Is it really a vacation if you don't come back with at least one ridiculous hat?
They say not all those who wander are lost, but clearly they haven't seen me trying to find my hotel room.
Travel tip: pack light. Your emotional baggage will still be overweight.
I'm a travel addict on the road to recovery. Just kidding, I'm on the road to the airport.
You know it's time for a vacation when you start looking for secret messages in your spam email.
Going through airport security is the modern equivalent of medieval torture. Only less comfortable seating.
Remember, you can't spell 'traveler' without several letters that really don't need to be there.
Not all who are sunburned lost the sunscreen. Some just love to live the lobster life.
Traveling: because even your watch needs a change of time zone now and then.
My six pack is very important to me. That's how I carry my souvenirs.
I don't need therapy, I just need to go camping. Same thing, fewer couches.
Going abroad is a great way to realize that your basic language skills are just basic.
Yes, I do have a retirement plan. I plan to go traveling.
I asked Siri for the meaning of life, she showed me the way to the nearest travel agency.
Traveling – it leaves you speechless, then turns you into a storyteller that can’t find the right charger adapter.
Eat well, travel often, and pretend your carry-on bag fits in the overhead bin.
My perfect vacation: a one-way ticket and a vague return plan.
A hotel room all to myself is my version of "Eat, Pray, Love".
My dream job would be a travel blogger. Reality is more like a 'lost luggage consultant'.
Travel is my therapy, but I'd settle for a trip to the fridge at 3 AM.
Exploring the great outdoors is wonderful until the outdoors decides you look tasty.
If traveling was free, you'd never see me again. And no, not because I'd be invisible.
I'm great at multitasking. I can panic, overpack, and make lists all at the same time.
Some travel to find themselves. I travel to find a less crowded restroom.
Adventures are great, especially when the path is paved with good eats and WiFi.
Camping: where you spend a small fortune to live like a homeless person.
Don't listen to what they say. Go see. Or at least Google it.
There should be sympathy cards for having to come back to work from vacation.
Anyone who says you can't buy happiness has clearly never bought a plane ticket.
Travel is the art of collecting postcards and fridge magnets that you'll eventually get tired of dusting.
Remember to explore the road less traveled. It usually has less potholes.
Never underestimate the therapeutic power of driving and listening to very loud music.
Traveling is like flirting with life. It's saying 'I would stay and love you, but I have to go; this is my station'.
The closest thing to time travel is waking up in a new timezone with no coffee.
Traveling is an expensive way to ask yourself what day of the week it is.
You haven't experienced true fear until you've tried to shut an overpacked suitcase.
Travel tip #237: Convince a friend to give you a piggyback when your feet hurt. It's eco-friendly transport!
A journey of a thousand miles begins with a credit card authorization.
Going back to work after vacation is like losing a game of Jenga: everything collapses and no one wants to clean up the mess.
Travel lets me collect moments, not just vacation days.
Traveling is like a giant pie. Whoever takes the biggest slice has the best stories.
On the bright side, getting lost usually leads to unexpected souvenirs.
If there's no embarrassing photo of you holding up the Leaning Tower of Pisa, did you even go to Italy?
When life gives you lemons, squeeze one in your hair and head to the beach.
Why do our friends back home want "unique" gifts from our travels? You're getting a magnet, Karen. Be grateful.
Travel is the only context in which too many cocktails can be considered "immersing yourself in the local culture."
That moment when you realize "lost in translation" is just a fancy way of saying "I ordered the wrong thing."
Your vacation 'out of office' message is a haiku about needing to be as far from your desk as possible.
A day without sunshine is night. A day without traveling is... well, incredibly boring.
Climbing mountains? I thought you said reclining moments.
I consider my suitcase my closest companion — it's always by my side and goes with me on all my adventures.
Who says you can't buy happiness? It's called plane tickets to tropical destinations.
If you don't look like your passport photo by the end of the trip, did you even vacation hard enough?
Sightseeing would be a lot easier if historical landmarks just wandered around visiting you instead.
Sometimes the road less traveled is just a misprint in the guidebook.
Friends don't let friends travel with more than one gigantic suitcase. How else will you sneak in extra souvenirs?
I didn't choose the jet-set life; my holiday cravings chose it for me.
Beach vacations: because it's about time your legs saw the sun too.
Traveling is the best way to become a certified snack expert from various countries.
If you're not ready to stuff your heavy coat in a suitcase the moment you arrive in a tropical location, do you even travel?
Good things come to those who book flights.
When on vacation, calories don't count and money magically replenishes itself.
The best travel experiences involve mysterious stains and unexpected detours.
I travel to leave behind the daily grind, but somehow it always gets forwarded to my hotel room.
My favorite part of traveling is when my GPS says "recalculating" and I pretend it's cheering me on.
I'm pretty sure my birthstone is a seashell.
Somewhere between "I'm sure I packed it" and "Let's buy a new one there," lies a vacation.
If at first, you don't succeed, try taking a vacation and forget about it completely.
To awaken quite alone in a strange town is one of the pleasantest sensations in the world. You have nothing to do but go find breakfast.
The most beautiful in the world is, of course, the world itself.
An adventure is only an inconvenience rightly considered. An inconvenience is only an adventure wrongly considered.
Dreadful those strawberries and the cream seem when ambulance passes you by.
Wouldn’t it be wrong to take a drug that erases memory? But after all, who will question you when they don’t remember anything?
It's always sunny above the clouds, so I just take extra flights on gloomy days.
If your vacation doesn't include a weird story about interacting with a local, you're vacationing wrong.
The only trip you'll regret is the one you don't take. And the one where you forget your passport.
Someday, I want to be rich enough to not blink at the minibar prices.
It's bad manners to keep a vacation waiting.
